She's Adopted

They just didn't tell her

Very Inspiring Blogger Award

on June 28, 2013

very-inspiring-blogger-award 

 

One of the best things that blogging has brought to me, was the opportunity to meet great and very intelligent individuals from all over the world. The emotional support, the kindness, the love I receive from you are incredible!  And Two days ago, this blog was awarded with the “Very Inspiring Blogger Award” by Gabriel Lucatero from SYL101!!!  How nice is that?

I want to take this opportunity to say a big “thank you” to all the friends of my blog – those who read and liked my posts, those who read and ranked my posts, those who just read my posts, those who read and commented on my posts, those who linked my blog/posts to theirs, those who follow my blog, those who re blogs my posts; those who, like Gabriel, nominated me for awards and those who appreciated my posts/blog and prayed for me during my difficult times.

Please keep coming back and recommend this blog. There are so many people out there clueless of the impact of Adoption on the Adoptees.

Choosing a child to become part of a family can be a warm and wonderful experience for both the child and the parents. My blog is my way of trying to reduce the misconception that an adopted child is somehow better off not knowing they are adopted.

I was born and illegally adopted in Brazil. There is no paperwork; there are no explanations from anyone involved. My adoptive mother doesn’t even talk to me anymore because I “hurt” her feelings by discovering at age of 40 that I was adopted and wanted to know my origins.

I grew up with many health problems. I remember spending hours and hours of my childhood sitting in hospitals and waiting rooms all over the country. I was growing too fast. My heart beat was too fast. I was constantly falling and my vision was failing quickly. I have Marfans Syndrome.

My adoptive family kept all information they had from me and still does.

They had the opportunity to explain to me that people only inherit Marfan’s Syndrome, meaning that they get the mutation from a parent who has the disorder, but my adoptive family chose to hide this information from me. I grew up under the false impression that the mutation started with me, since there was no one in the family with Marfan’s.

My heart started failing in 2000 and I had my first open heart surgery on March 10th.  Coincidentally, On March 10th of this year, I had an Aorta Aneurysm and almost lost my life during a 14 hour surgery. I am recovering very well though J  and my adoptive mother and brothers still doesn’t talk to me about my adoption and who are my birth parents and what is their history.  Apparently I have no rights to know the truth.  My truth.
Over 4,000 diseases are caused by single defective genes. Missing and sketchy health histories put adopted persons at risk, particularly as they age and need to know the risk factors for common killers such as cancer and heart diseases.

Adrenoleukodystrophy
Albinism (ocular form)
Alzheimer’s Disease
Charcot-Marie-Tooth Disease
Congenital Adrenal Hyperplasia
Familial Amyloid Neuropathy
Familial Polyposis of the Colon
Growth Hormone Deficiency
Hemophilia A
Incontinentia Pigmenti
Manic Depression (bipolar type)
Muscular Dystrophy (Duchenne type)
Neurofibromatosis
Osteogenesis Imperfecta
Polycystic Kidney Disease (adult type)
Retinoblastoma
Spinal Muscular Atrophy Thalassemias
Von Willebrand Disease
Wiskott-Aldrich Syndrome
Agammaglobulinemia
Alpha-1 Antitrypsin Deficiency
Aniridia
Chronic Granulomatous Disease
Cystic Fibrosis
Familial Hypercholesterolemia
Fragile-X Syndrome
Hemochromatosis
Huntington’s Disease
Lymphoproliferative Syndrome
Muscular Dystrophy (Becker type)
Muscular Dystrophy (myotonic type)
Ornithine Transcarbamylase Deficiency
Phenylketonuria
Retinitis Pigmentosa
Sickle-cell Anemia
Tuberous Sclerosis
Wilms’ Tumor

“Morally, there is no family, and no person planning to have a child who can ignore the new genetic discoveries and techniques for preventing genetic disease. Your health and welfare and that of your (future) children are at stake. We all have a right and, indeed, an obligation to know about our particular genes and to consider the options available that increase our chances of having healthy children. We should also all have the freedom to exercise these options as we wish and as rationally as we are able.”

“Knowing your family’s health history can save your life,” said Dr. Eric E. Whitaker, Director of the Illinois Department of Public Health. “By having the information readily available, doctors can more closely monitor a person’s health for common diseases, such as heart disease, cancer and diabetes, or even rare disorders like sickle cell anemia or hemophilia, that can run in families.”
– Aubrey Milunsky, M.D.

The Fourteenth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution, section 1 states:

“All persons born or naturalized in the United States, and subject to the jurisdiction thereof, are citizens of the United States and of the state wherein they reside. No state shall make or enforce any law which shall abridge the privileges or immunities of citizens of the United States; nor shall any state deprive any person of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law; nor deny to any person within its jurisdiction the equal protection of the laws.”

 Jo  Swanson says: “Where in the 14th Amendment – or anywhere else in the Constitution – does it give one citizen the right to sign away the rights of another citizen? Where is a parent authorized to sign away certain rights of her child, unredeemable at age of majority? No relinquishment of parental rights document in any state reserves a single right to the mother; not one. It’s not a “contract.” It’s a total surrender of ALL rights with regard to her child. What is done with all documentation from that moment on is totally and forever out of her control, as indeed it should be.

The truth is that while some states grant adoptees access to their original birth certificates (OBCs) and have never deprived them of this right (Kansas and Alaska), other states deny them OBC access, and therefore that civil right. Still other states have passed access-to-OBC legislation in recent years, some with no restrictions and others with varying degrees of restriction.  

So, the bottom line is that the 14th Amendment rights are applied unevenly among the various states, creating subgroups of U.S. citizens. Creating even more subgroups are those from all states whose adoptions took place beyond infancy. They commonly already have copies of their OBCs, particularly if they were used to register for kindergarten. Some adoptees from let’s say, Minnesota are lucky enough to own their OBCs, while others aren’t.

Are you aware that even children adopted by a step-parent get their original certificates sealed?

How would you, feel about the thought of having your name expunged from your child’s birth certificate if you died during her minor years, replaced by the name of another “mother” who had nothing to do with her birth? And if your daughter hadn’t already obtained a copy of her authentic birth certificate before your death and filed it away for safekeeping, she would be denied a copy with your name on it as her mother?

Some people’s family’s experience with adoption, their family’s secrets, and the less-than-ideal relationship dynamics cannot – and must not – be used as a basis for shaping adoption law or policy. Our government must not be in the business of micromanaging family relationships. Adults choose to associate with other adults or not. Is that really so difficult to accept?

It’s time that the 14th Amendment of our U.S. Constitution is applied consistently and evenly to all U.S. citizens, whether raised in their families of birth or in adoptive families. It’s time we repealed the laws that sealed adoptees’ birth certificates and restored the rights they once had but were swept from under them decades ago.

What possible justification could there be for treating adult adoptees differently from the rest of society?  I’ve not found any”. (Source:  http://www.minnpost.com/community-voices/2013/03/adult-adoptees-should-have-unconditional-access-their-original-birth-certif)

 

And now, that you know what is my Blog about, I would like to nominate the following blogs for this same award:

  1. http://landofgazillionadoptees.com/our-motto/
  2. http://everydaygurus.com/2013/06/23/how-blogging-saved-my-marriage-and-life/
  3. http://syl101.wordpress.com/
  4. http://networkedblogs.com/MlJIU
  5. http://tonningsen.wordpress.com/
  6. http://escalafobetico.wordpress.com/2008/11/12/manual-adocao-adotado/
  7. http://souadotado.blogspot.com/
  8. http://blogdajussarajatoba.blogspot.com/
  9. http://filhosadotivos.blogspot.com/
  10. http://www.rageagainsttheminivan.com/p/about-me.html
  11. http://sabres4jeff.wordpress.com/tag/late-discovery-adoptee/
  12. http://enjoylifeforonce.com/
  13. http://www.mamamia.com.au/
  14. http://thebettermanprojects.com/
  15. http://latediscovery.org/
The Rules for accepting the Award:
  1. Thank and link back to the awesome person who nominated you.
  2. Share  things about yourself.
  3. Nominate 15 other bloggers and comment on their blogs to let them know. 
  4. Add the picture of the Award to your blog

 

 


5 responses to “Very Inspiring Blogger Award

  1. […] to She’s Adopted (They Just Didn’t Tell Her), an LDA blog, for winning the Very Inspiring Blogger […]

  2. Kozo Hattori says:

    Wow, Luciana. I am so sorry that your adopting mother withholds this information from you. I hope all the research done in genetics can shed light on your biological past soon. {{{hugs}}} from me for your struggles. May you be free from suffering. May you find peace and joy.
    Congratulations on the well deserved award. Kozo

  3. lynnemiller says:

    Congratulations on the blogger award, Luciana. That’s an accomplishment! I’m sorry you are dealing with so much resistance from your adoptive family. Like you, I found out I was adopted as an adult, after my adoptive parents had died. They left no documentation on my adoption. Last year, I obtained a copy of my original birth certificate from Illinois. It was exciting to get that piece of paper. I’m no longer an “undocumented” adoptee!

  4. Patty Canedo says:

    My dear i would like to ask you for help.. Im a voluntier helping familly to reunited. You migth be available to help me to find this people.. A mother is looking for her son was born with the name Sergio Leonardo Gonzaga Cardoso, was born O1/02/1986 From Brasil someone kidnapped from his grandparents front yard. Zulmira Gonzaga Cardoso mom been looking for him for 26 years.In 1980s alot kids were kidnapped and sold to Israel also USA. Please hel us to find thi young gay. thank you very much.

  5. Patty Canedo says:

    A mother is looking for her daugther borned with the name Izabela, She might have another name now.. She could be 40 years old.
    Mother name is Rosaria Dias dos Santos. Fom Brazil Phone number of Brasil (38) 9235.7531
    Thank you amiga for your help please share this information.

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